Septic Jokes are No Laughing Matter

How does toilet humor help a pumper charge more for a professional environmental service? That question came to mind recently when I visited the Web site of a septic service company that was recommended for a Pumper profile story.

How does toilet humor help a pumper charge more for a professional environmental service? That question came to mind recently when I visited the Web site of a septic service company that was recommended for a Pumper profile story. I don’t want to single out this company, so I won’t mention its name or location.

In many respects, the pumping company put its best, most professional foot forward in producing its new Web site. The home page features a photo of a newer, clean service rig. The front page touts a wide range of services, including some diverse jobs that would help many residential and business customers do vital one-stop shopping. They are savvy in mentioning an environmentally friendly focus.

Clicking around the site, I noticed several initiatives aimed at creative marketing and customer education. The company offered a discount for customer referrals. They had a great FAQ, or frequently asked questions page, where the specifics of proper disposal and environmental concerns are laid out in a straightforward manner.

They personalized the site by showing photos of the owners and hardworking technicians in the field.

All in all, they seem like an outfit that’s on the ball and providing quality customer service. “But wait,’’ as the TV infomercial pitchman always says, “there’s more …’’

First, the company’s name is a play on words referring to an age-old joke in the pumping industry. I don’t want to be more specific than that. And they dedicate a page on their Web site to repeating many unfortunate, but long-lingering phrases that poke fun at septic pumping. A few of them are, “Invite us to your next blowout,’’ “We take crap from everyone’’ and “It used to be your bread and butter and now it’s ours!’’ There are many more-distasteful examples not worth repeating here.

Now I’m not saying people shouldn’t enjoy a sense of humor. And, well, there’s nothing wrong with a good chuckle among friends in the industry. But what possible good purpose does it serve to broadcast a list of your favorite lines of toilet humor on a Web site aimed at promoting a professional service?

Let’s say you want to attract a few new customers, and your goal is to raise your rate for a particular pumping service from $100 to $125. So you start by promoting quality 24-hour customer service. You show your technicians wearing uniforms and appropriate safety attire. Then you make sure your truck looks clean and well maintained. It’s all good so far. Would your next step be to tell potential customers, “You do your business and we’ll do ours’’? That’s what this company did.

A while ago, someone who is fed up with this type of humor in the industry, asked me an interesting question: “When have you ever seen a plumber put jokes like these on their trucks or in their advertising?’’ His point was that the plumbing industry, in general, has found a way to cultivate a more professional image for itself, and consequently add value for its service. After thinking back to my last bill from the plumber, I had to concur about the “value added’’ point.

And why should the septic industry be any different? Can we all agree that toilet humor doesn’t serve to enhance a pumper’s professionalism or attract ever-more-sophisticated consumers? If so, why is it still out front, printed on trucks and in Web sites?



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