Separately, love and business are two of life’s greatest challenges. What happens when you weave them together? The possibilities run the gamut from bliss to disaster. While most couples can’t imagine working with their spouse, more and more couples are doing just that. Couples in their 20s and 30s — as well as early retirees — are becoming partners in business and marriage.

Working with your spouse can be a glorious experience or your worst nightmare.

Successful couples describe how they enjoy both business and marital bliss as a result of working together. Those who are successful as business partners have the opportunity to fully integrate their work and their personal life. They express satisfaction in working for themselves, owning and operating their own business and develop closer bonds with their spouse at the same time.

However, working together is risky business and can have a devastating effect on your marriage. Teaming up with your spouse may not always be total bliss. Couples in business together typically work longer hours than other couples, experience less financial security than those in corporate jobs, are exposed to greater financial risk, and can experience increased stress since there is a single income source. For many couples, the business relationship creates more tension in their marriage. If they have a weak marriage, it will likely grow weaker.

A solid foundation

Couples in business together must achieve success in work and marriage. They don’t have the luxury of succeeding in one area at the expense of the other.

We argue that the key to success for husband and wife teams is learning how to communicate properly. Sharpening communication skills is the single most important ingredient, the cornerstone to a successful business and a successful marriage. Couples who enhance communication skills will minimize misunderstandings, clarify expectations, build healthier relationships, increase productivity and manage conflict more effectively.

Our communication training company surveyed 70 couples throughout the United States — 90 percent of whom have been in business together more than five years. Many of our respondents were from northern Wisconsin, representing such “mom and pop” businesses as septic services, restaurants, coffee shops, retail shops and resorts. Their insights, experiences and anecdotal remarks helped to identify various keys to success. In addition to highlighting the importance of communication, several other keys were brought into focus.

Couples must discover for themselves how to balance and/or blend work and family time. They must determine who will be responsible for various tasks and issues and clearly identify respective job responsibilities. They need to learn how to make their personality differences work for their business. They need to discover preferred communication styles and explore whether these methods interfere with or support what they’re trying to accomplish.

Also, couples should develop conflict resolution strategies that build relationships and allow both parties to feel comfortable with the outcome. They need to develop skills to make decisions, solve problems, complete deals and resolve disputes. They need to learn how to resolve conflict in a manner that is fair, efficient, and friendly.

Working it out

Based on our research, we’ve put together a list of the essential strategies for success for couples who work together:

• Your business activities must be in some way compatible with your marriage and family life.

• As a couple, you must have a healthy, mature relationship.

• There must be effective communication between spouses.

• Clearly define your roles at work.

• Each partner must bring significant value to the business.

• At least one of you needs to pay attention to the bottom line.

• You must create a healthy balance of work, family and personal time.

• You must learn to deal effectively with change and stress.

• You must be able to resolve conflict effectively.

Keep in mind that as you blend business, personal and family life, stress is inevitable. By enhancing your communication skills, you will better identify situations that are stressful to you and your spouse and will be better prepared to cope with them. Equipped with effective communication tools, you will be poised for success. You will have taken a major step toward success in your business, in your marriage, and in your family life. By building bridges to better communication you will grow your business and your marriage.